Flying Spaghetti Monster

Ieri am discutat despre transformarea lui "God damn it" in "Allah damn it" si s-a pus intrebarea: "Ce expresie foloseste un ateu?". Cea mai buna sugestie a fost Flying Spaghetti Monster, damn it.
FSM (Flying Spaghetti Monster) este un fel de profet pentru pastafarieni.

Pastafarianismul este o religie inventata de Bobby Henderson in 2005. Ea implica existenta unei entitati de natura divina ("creator") despre care Henderson spune ca poate fi orice lucru pe care ti l-ai putea imagina, in consecinta, de ce nu un monstru zburator din spaghete? ( :| )

"The Gospel of The Flying Spaghetti Monster" le serveste pastafarienilor drept biblie, iar sacrul monstru zburator din spaghete este un fel de Moise. Si daca tot am ajuns la Moise, pastafarienii au 8 porunci usor neobisnuite, scrise intr-un limbaj "contemporan" (adicatelea argou).

1# I'd really rather you didn't act like a sanctimonious holier-than-thou ass when describing my noodly goodness. If some people don't believe in me, that's okay. Really, I'm not that vain. Besides, this isn't about them so don't change the subject.
>>

2# I'd really rather you didn't use my existence as a means to oppress, subjugate, punish, eviscerate, and/or, you know, be mean to others. I don't require sacrifices, and purity is for drinking water, not people.
>>eviscerate?!?

3# I'd really rather you didn't judge people for the way they look, or how they dress, or the way they talk, or, well, just play nice, Okay? Oh, and get this into your thick heads: woman = person. man = person. Samey = Samey. One is not better than the other, unless we're talking about fashion and I'm sorry, but I gave that to women and some guys who know the difference between teal and fuschia.
>>care este diferenta dintre o lisita si fuschia?

4# I'd really rather you didn't indulge in conduct that offends yourself, or your willing, consenting partner of legal age AND mental maturity. As for anyone who might object, I think the expression is go **** yourself, unless they find that offensive in which case they can turn off the TV for once and go for a walk for a change.
>> :))

5# I'd really rather you didn't challenge the bigoted, misogynistic, hateful ideas of others on an empty stomach. Eat, then go after the girls.
>> =))

6# I'd really rather you didn't build multi million-dollar churches/temples/mosques/shrines to my noodly goodness when the money could be better spent (take your pick):
1. Ending poverty
2. Curing diseases
3. Living in peace, loving with passion, and lowering the cost of cable
I might be a complex-carbohydrate omniscient being, but I enjoy the simple things in life. I ought to know. I AM the creator.
>> neah! Partea cu ganditul se face dupa ce ai cheltuit banii :D

7# I'd really rather you didn't go around telling people I talk to you. You're not that interesting. Get over yourself. And I told you to love your fellow man, can't you take a hint?
>> ignorance is bliss

8# I'd really rather you didn't do unto others as you would have them do unto you if you are into, um, stuff that uses a lot of leather/lubricant/Las Vegas. If the other person is into it, however (pursuant to #4), then have at it, take pictures, and for the love of Mike, wear a CONDOM! Honestly, it's a piece of rubber. If I didn't want it to feel good when you did it I would have added spikes, or something.
>> :)):))

Depre aceasta pseudo-religie, puteti citi cat de mult vreti pe Wikipedia, adica aici [click].